Someone you loved has died, and now you’re standing in their home surrounded by a lifetime of belongings. Every drawer, every closet, every room is full of things that meant something to them. And you have to deal with all of it.

This is one of the hardest tasks in grief. It’s physical, emotional, and logistical all at once. There’s no right way to feel about it — angry, sad, overwhelmed, strangely numb, or all of the above. But there is a practical way to approach it that protects you, respects their memory, and gets the job done.

Before You Touch Anything: Legal and Practical First Steps

Step 1 — Confirm Legal Authority

You cannot legally dispose of someone’s belongings without authority. Make sure you have one of the following:

  • Letters Testamentary or Letters of Administration — issued by probate court, authorizing you as executor/administrator
  • Small estate affidavit — for estates below your state’s threshold (varies, typically $25,000-$75,000)
  • Written agreement from all heirs — if there’s no will and you’re one of multiple beneficiaries

Why this matters: If you throw away Uncle Frank’s coin collection and it turns out Cousin Lisa was supposed to inherit it, you could be personally liable for its value. Get the legal piece straight first.

For help finding an estate attorney, read our estate attorney guide.

Step 2 — Secure the Property

  • Change the locks if other people had keys
  • Check that insurance is still active on the property (homeowner’s coverage typically continues for a period after death, but verify)
  • Forward their mail to the executor’s address
  • Keep utilities on — you need lights, water, and climate control during cleanout
  • Check for security cameras or alarm systems and update codes

Step 3 — Take Stock Before You Start

Before moving or removing anything:

  1. Walk through every room and photograph everything — this protects you legally and helps with estate valuation
  2. Check for a safe or lockbox — look in master bedroom closets, basements, home offices
  3. Gather important documents immediately — will, trust documents, insurance policies, deeds, titles, financial statements, tax returns
  4. Check for hazards — if the home was neglected, there could be mold, pest infestations, expired medications, or structural issues
  5. Note anything obviously valuable — jewelry, art, antiques, collections, firearms

The Sorting System That Actually Works

After cleaning hundreds of estates, this is the system I’ve seen work best:

Five Categories

Set up five clearly labeled areas:

  1. KEEP — items of sentimental or financial value that heirs want
  2. DISTRIBUTE — items promised to specific people (check the will, any letters of intent, or verbal wishes family members recall)
  3. SELL — items with resale value (furniture, electronics, vehicles, collections)
  4. DONATE — usable items with no significant resale value
  5. DISPOSE — trash, broken items, expired goods, hazardous materials

Room-by-Room Approach

Don’t try to sort the whole house at once. Go room by room:

Start with: The easiest room (usually a guest room or bathroom). Small wins build momentum.

Save for last: Their bedroom and the room where they spent the most time. These are the most emotionally loaded.

The kitchen: More time-consuming than you’d expect. Check every cabinet and drawer — people stash things in kitchens (cash in sugar canisters, documents in cookbooks, valuables in the back of the freezer).

The garage/basement/attic: These take the longest and often contain the most surprises — both valuable and hazardous. Old paint, chemicals, and solvents need proper disposal, not regular trash.

Finding Hidden Valuables

People hide things. Especially older people who grew up distrusting banks. In my experience, here’s where to look:

Common Hiding Spots

  • Inside books — flip through every book. Cash, bonds, and photos are commonly stored in books.
  • Taped to the back of drawers — pull drawers all the way out and check behind and under them
  • Inside coffee cans, cookie tins, and food containers — especially in pantries and garages
  • Under mattresses and inside box springs — the classic, and people still use it
  • Freezer — wrapped in foil or inside frozen food containers
  • Medicine cabinets — behind items, in old prescription bottles
  • Clothing pockets — check every pocket of every piece of clothing before donating
  • Coat closets — inside coat pockets, hat boxes, and shoe boxes
  • Basement and attic — in boxes labeled as something mundane (“Christmas decorations” or “old magazines”)
  • Safes — obvious, but check closets, under beds, and behind hanging clothes
  • Cars — glove box, under seats, trunk, spare tire compartment

Common Valuable Items People Miss

  • Vintage clothing (certain brands and eras are worth hundreds)
  • Old toys in original packaging
  • Vinyl records (certain pressings are worth $50-$5,000+)
  • Stamps and coins (get these appraised, don’t guess)
  • Vintage tools and equipment
  • Costume jewelry that’s actually real (test it)
  • Old electronics (vintage radios, cameras, gaming consoles)
  • Firearms (check legal requirements in your state before moving them)

What to Do With Everything

Selling Items

For high-value items ($500+):

  • Get professional appraisals (estate sale companies, auction houses, specialty dealers)
  • Consider an estate sale company — they handle pricing, display, and sale for 30-40% commission
  • Online auctions (eBay, specialized platforms) for collectibles and niche items

For moderate-value items ($50-$500):

  • Facebook Marketplace and Craigslist for furniture and appliances
  • Consignment shops for clothing and accessories
  • Specialty buyers for books, records, and media

For vehicles:

  • Check fair market value on KBB or Edmunds
  • You’ll need the title transferred through probate first
  • Consider donating for a tax deduction if the vehicle isn’t worth much

Donating Items

  • Habitat for Humanity ReStore — takes furniture, appliances, building materials
  • Goodwill / Salvation Army — general household items (many offer free pickup)
  • Local shelters — often need bedding, kitchenware, and clothing
  • Veterans’ organizations — DAV, VVA accept many household items
  • Keep donation receipts — deductible against the estate if it’s large enough to file

Disposing of Hazardous Items

These CANNOT go in regular trash:

  • Medications — take to a pharmacy or DEA take-back location
  • Paint, solvents, chemicals — your local hazardous waste facility
  • Firearms — contact local police for guidance on legal transfer or disposal
  • Old electronics with batteries
  • Propane tanks, fire extinguishers

When to Hire Professional Estate Cleanout

DIY Is Reasonable When:

  • The home is in normal condition
  • There’s no biohazard situation
  • You have time (plan 40-100+ hours for an average house)
  • You have help (don’t do this alone — physically or emotionally)
  • The estate is straightforward (clear will, cooperative heirs)

Hire Professionals When:

  • The home is in hoarding conditions — read our hoarding cleanup guide
  • There’s been a death in the home with biohazard conditions — this is not a DIY cleanup
  • The home is far away and you can’t make multiple trips
  • Time pressure — the house needs to be cleared for sale, rental, or lease termination
  • Emotional overwhelm — there’s no shame in this. Professional estate cleanout companies are compassionate and efficient.
  • Pest infestations or mold — these are health hazards

What Professional Cleanout Costs

  • Basic cleanout (average home, no hazards): $2,000 – $5,000
  • Large home or heavy contents: $5,000 – $10,000
  • Hoarding situation: $10,000 – $50,000+
  • With biohazard remediation: add $5,000 – $30,000+

Many estate cleanout companies will offset their fee by selling valuable items they find, so the net cost may be lower.

Taking Care of Yourself

This isn’t just logistics. You’re grieving while doing one of the most physically and emotionally draining tasks of your life.

Permission Slips

  • It’s OK to keep things that don’t make logical sense — that ugly mug that reminds you of Sunday mornings
  • It’s OK to throw things away — keeping everything doesn’t honor their memory, it just fills your house
  • It’s OK to take breaks — this doesn’t have to be done in one weekend
  • It’s OK to hire help — outsourcing the physical work doesn’t mean you care less
  • It’s OK to feel relief when it’s done — that doesn’t make you a bad person

Practical Self-Care

  • Don’t do this alone. Bring someone, even if they just sit there.
  • Take before-and-after photos — seeing progress helps on hard days
  • Set a timer. Work for 2 hours, then stop. Come back tomorrow.
  • Eat actual meals. Grief plus physical labor on an empty stomach is a recipe for a breakdown.
  • If grief is overwhelming, a therapist who specializes in bereavement can help. Find grief counseling support.

When to Get Professional Help

Call a biohazard professional if:

  • The person died in the home and decomposition occurred
  • You find evidence of animal hoarding or severe pet neglect
  • There’s mold, sewage, or other contamination
  • You find drug paraphernalia or evidence of drug manufacturing

Call an estate attorney if:

  • Multiple heirs disagree about distribution
  • The will is contested
  • The estate has significant debts
  • There are properties in multiple states

Call an estate cleanout company if:

  • The task feels physically impossible
  • You live far away
  • There’s time pressure
  • You need it done compassionately but efficiently

Every guide on WhenItHappens is written by someone with hands-on experience in estate cleanup and biohazard remediation. Call us at (855) 566-2405 or find a vetted cleanup specialist.